like the stars (fel y sêr)
by Laura013
Summary: A hundred years time, and Jack Harkness still remembers his beautiful Welshman. "He was like the stars." rated T to be safe Jack/Ianto one-shot COMPLETE


**fel y sêr**

**Welsh: like the stars**

* * *

**Disclaimer: Don't own Torchwood. Damn shame too. Wish I did. Then maybe someone that wasn't bloody Gwen Cooper would've survived it all. **

**Hope my Welsh is okay. It isn't my first language or anything, although I know a bit (obviously, I wrote this), but it may sound like a four year old if you do speak Welsh. Also, if you speak Welsh, FFN doesn't allow anyone to post stories in Welsh and I view this as a problem. Anyway, enough of my ranting, enjoy the rest of your day to everyone :P**

* * *

"Tell me about him."

The words echoed around Jack Harkness's empty brain. They were the first words he had heard in a long time, and they stung like a knife. The words bounced back and forth in his cobwebbed brain, just like the words spoken before.

Ianto had fretted constantly that in a blink of the immortal man's eye, Ianto would be dead, and that Jack would forget. But that was the real curse on Captain Jack Harkness. The memories only got stronger and more painful with age.

* * *

_[Flashback: Greeks Bearing Gifts]_

_"Jack, can we talk for a moment? It's about… it's about Ianto," Toshiko Sato, computer specialist and long-time Torchwood employee stood in front of Jack's door. _

_Considering the fact that not two hours prior Jack had killed Mary, the woman Tosh had fallen for, she looked good. _

_"Yeah, come on in," he replied cautiously. "Sit down," he said, motioning towards the adjacent seat in front of him. She sat slowly in the plush leather chair. "What's wrong?" _

_"When… when I wore the pendant, I happened to hear something that Ianto was thinking…" her voice trailed off._

_Jack stiffened. "Continue," he said tersely. _

_"I… well it was something he said, er, well, something he _thought_," she said, her voice trailing off yet again. "Here, I wrote it down." Tosh shuffled around in her black leather handbag, pulling at a patent notebook. _

_Then she began to read. _

_"Can't imagine a time when this isn't everything. Pain so constant, like my stomach's full of rats. Feels like this is all I am now. There isn't an inch of me that doesn't hurt." _

_As Toshiko read, Jack felt tears begin to well up in his eyes, and he averted his gaze, blinking back any remnants of liquid. _

_"Are you alright, Jack?" Tosh stopped reading, pushing the spiral notebook back into her bag, shoving her glasses back up the bridge of her nose, where they had fallen._

_"Yeah," he said, voice exasperated. "Just… didn't know he still hurt like that," he said softly, looking for some kind of innuendo to lighten the mood. He came up empty. _

_"I just… I don't know what to do. How can we help him, Jack?" _

_Her curious brown eyes stared up at him, shocking him out of the blanket of surprise that had been coating his sharp, chiseled features. _

_"The Doctor would know. He always knows what to do," Jack said wistfully. _

_Tosh took in a deep breath. _

_"You know, I never told you this, but I've met the Doctor before," she said softly. _

_Jack leaned in intently. _

_"You _have_?" he asked, surprised. _

_"Yeah. It was maybe about a year ago," she said. "Space pig," she whispered to herself, voice cracking with mirth, like it was a private joke. _

_Jack stared at her. Despite all anger he felt that the Doctor had been in London, where Jack could have found him, he couldn't help but laugh._

_"You never cease to amaze me, Toshiko Sato," he said, laughter bubbling from his lips. Tosh frowned up at him._

_"But what are we going to do about Ianto?"_

_"I don't know," he whispered. And he really didn't._

* * *

Harkness didn't open his mouth at the words of the (slightly) younger man.

At least, he didn't yet. It still hurt too much for words.

* * *

_[Flashback: Children of Earth: Day Four]_

_"It's too late. I've breathed the air."_

_The words rang through his ears, just like the Doctor's words would ring in a hundred years time as he panicked, searching for an antidote. _

_The words scared him._

_Fear was irrelevant to Jack Harkness. Since the vast majority of fears revolved around death, and he couldn't be killed, fear hadn't affected the man in a long time. _

_But now they scared him, and the fear scared him too. _

_But the words didn't scare him as much as the young man's next ones._

_"I love you," he whispered into the crook of his arm. _

_This was where Jack Harkness saw eye to eye with fear itself. He had been scared to promise himself away, not scared for his own death, but scared to love someone so much that when they died, he would be left alone again. _

_"Don't," he whispered._

* * *

"Ef oedd fel y sêr," he whispered, voice choking with tears. His voice felt gravelly and rough after a hundred lifetimes of not speaking, yet he still remembered the Welsh Ianto had insisted on teaching him.

Of course, the TARDIS translated it immediately.

_He was like the stars._

* * *

_[Flashback: Random Shoes]_

_"Come on, Jack. You've been a citizen for over a hundred years, and yet you can't bother to speak one word of Welsh?" Ianto's soft Welsh vowels stroked and comforted Jack's ears, although he had yet to know how much he needed it. _

_"Why bother? It's not like it's used anymore, it's practically a dead language," he said, smiling at the young man._

_Ianto looked offended. _

_"Welsh is an important language!" he exclaimed. Suddenly, he bent down and whispered something in Jack's ear. "Rwyf wrth fy modd i chi, Jack Harkness," Then he stood up straight, bright red color flushing into his cheeks, his eyebrows rising. He ran a shaking hand through his hair, fluffing it up. _

_Jack affectionately ran his hands through Ianto's hair, unaware of the large commitment Ianto Jones had made._

_He would later come to know that Ianto had said, "I love you."_

* * *

"How so," the Doctor asked. A small smile adorned his chiseled features. Some would have called the Doctor "old" or "ugly" because of his giant ears or the wrinkles under his eyes, but Jack knew different. His ears were part of what made him unique, and the wrinkles were smile lines.

"Atgofion, Doctor. Mae atgofion o'n bywydau. Yr oedd ei gwên, y twinkle yn ei lygaid, y camau cryndod llai ei ddwylo wrth iddo fynd am ei bywyd bob dydd, roedd yn seren-debyg."

Of course he had to learn to speak Welsh now. It was the only thing he had left to hold onto, the only thing left of Ianto Jones.

_Memories, Doctor. The memories of our lives. It was his smile, the twinkle in his eyes, the actions tremor-less in his hands as he goes about his daily life, he was star-like._

The Doctor smiled at the older man, sparkles twinkling in his eyes, as if to say, _"continue"_.

Jack opened his mouth again, flawless Welsh spilling out of his mouth. _Welsh always sounded better on Ianto's lips._

"Yr oedd ei garedigrwydd. Yr oedd mor garedig."

The TARDIS translated away.

_It was his kindness. He was so kind._

Tears began to form in the American's eyes.

"Mae fy ofn mwyaf oedd ymroddiad. Ac yn awr mae hefyd yn fy ngofid mwyaf." His voice was cut off by the tears.

_My biggest fear was the commitment. And now it's also my biggest regret._

The Doctor looked at him, and the pity was unmistakable. And then he turned to leave the immortal alone.

"Mae'n ddrwg gen i, Jones, Ianto Jones. Mae'n ddrwg gen i ac yr wyf yn dy garu di."

Although the Doctor had walked far away from Captain Jack Harkness, the TARDIS still translated his final sentence, leaving it burned in his mind.

_I'm sorry, Jones, Ianto Jones. I'm sorry and I love you._


End file.
